Kuzul

And for his next trick, Rougned Odor will pull a rabbit out of his hat. 

Yahoo! Sports’ David Brown spotted this video of the Rangers rookie losing a ball in his jersey, causing frustration for the 20-year-old and wild entertainment for the rest of us. 

In the bottom of the sixth inning, with the Rangers leading 4-0 over the Astros, third baseman Matt Dominguez slaps a ground ball towards second where Odor is waiting to gobble it up and…Oh, that’s very clever indeed. 

Instead of pulling off a routine out, Odor (whom we assume is limited to simply repeating his name when conversing with teammates) decides to show off the ol‘ hidden ball trick for the entertainment of thousands of fans in the stands. 

Really, it was just a case of dumb, horrible luck for the young infielder, whose face really tells the entire story. The announcer chimes in with, “That’s one you don’t see everyday; did everything right. (He) took one for the team, blocked the ball.”

Brown reminds that this is hardly the first time fans have seen this trick: 

It’s an oddity that happens from time to time in baseball. Jarrod Parker of the Athletics lost a ball in his jersey a couple of years ago that became a hit for Ichiro. And Brooks Conrad of the Braves had perhaps the most infamous recent instance of making a ball disappear in his uniform.

Snark and lame “Hodor” jokes aside, this was really just an intriguing moment amid something of a breakout game. Odor came into Monday night 2-for-12 on his young career, but he finally settled in and enjoyed quite the game at the plate. 

Against the Astros, Odor went 2-for-4, including a home run in the sixth that measured 431 feet. According to the Associated Press (h/t ESPN), the infielder has this to say, speaking through a translator, about his early MLB performance: “I’m not scared because it’s the same as down in the minor leagues. I take it in that perspective.”

Odor, it would seem, is taking everything in stride, including wonderfully peculiar mishaps that occur in just his fifth game in the bigs. 

It’s perspective that will aid Odor as he continues in his budding career, knowing all too well that one minute you are slamming a home run and the next you are providing a bit of amusement during a relatively ho-hum May game. 

Odor has already experienced some highs, lows and that meaty hilarity that takes place in between. 

Hit me up on Twitter: Follow @gabezal

Read more MLB news on BleacherReport.com

Nyjer Morgan is back giving postgame interviews, and he is better than ever.

Larry Brown Sports’ Larry Brown spotted a YouTube video that features audio of Morgan’s postgame exchange with WTAM of the Cleveland Indians Radio Network.

Rather than spoil a good time, we give you the two-minute clip below, filled with a healthy dose of exuberance and “Woo!”

Classic T-Plush.

Morgan begins with, “You said it. You said it. Woo, woo!” The elated Indians player then discusses the moment he clubbed a rare home run on Sunday night, giving Cleveland the eventual deciding run in a 6-5 win over the Tampa Bay Rays.

Morgan beams, “Hey, I’ve been working my trot since high school. They don’t come often, but when I get it, I’m [going to] let you know when I round second.”

Brown reminds that Morgan isn’t exactly a mainstay in Cleveland: “The outfielder also known as Tony Plush was recalled by the Cleveland Indians last week to fill in for Michael Bourn. He has been playing sporadically since being recalled, and he got in a full game on Sunday against the Rays.”

Given another opportunity, a player such as Morgan wasn’t going to worry about much more than just having a ball. He continues, “I know it’s our livelihood and everything, but you can’t lose track that it’s still a game.”

The 33-year-old, who went 3-for-4 in Sunday’s game, continued by saying he just wants to help the team in any way that he can, a statement that is right at home to so many athletes lending the usual array of postgame banter.

As we know, Morgan isn’t your ordinary athlete, as evidenced by this blast from the past wherein he explains his alter ego:

The outfielder is now batting .341 in just 41 at-bats this season. His status as an Indians player seems to rest on things such as Michael Bourn‘s form and his own consistency.

There is no question that Morgan continues to be one of the more electric players in MLB, yielding so much entertainment when he is involved on the field and such hilarity when he is questioned off it.

Home runs may be rare, but the bat flips and shouts of “Woo!” will be prolific as long as Morgan is bumping around MLB.

Tony Plush is going to do him, and we absolutely like it that way.

Hit me up on Twitter: Follow @gabezal

Read more MLB news on BleacherReport.com

Joe Girardi and Laz Diaz exchanged words Monday night, which is a nice way of saying a manager/umpire shouting match ended with one party fuming and the other feeling as accomplished as Dikembe Mutombo swatting away a would-be dunker.

For The Win’s Ted Berg spotted a couple of videos from Monday’s game between the Yankees and Angels, one New York lost, 4-1.

The game wasn’t the only thing lost, because composure was at a premium in the eighth inning. However, some might say the skipper and Yankees relief pitcher Shawn Kelley—both tossed from the game by Diaz—were provoked into getting ejected.

Here are some thoughts from Girardi in the aftermath of a game that featured quite the peculiar ending:

The Yankees manager had this to say, via ESPN:

I mentioned to Laz in a respectful way that I thought the pitch was up to Kelly Johnson earlier in the game and he gave me the Mutombo [wagging his finger]. I don’t appreciate that. I’m not a little kid. I don’t need to be scolded. Obviously we’re trying to work together, and I just thought there were a lot of inconsistencies tonight.

If you believe Girardi, Diaz sent him to the clubhouse in much the same way a shot-blocking Mutombo once shamed NBA players. If that were the case, we certainly hope Girardi got some words in before heading off to cool down.

There were some, such as Daniel Brown of the San Jose Mercury News, who felt the advent of instant replay in MLB might kill off the entertainment that comes with irate managers scolding umpires. It seems Girardi and Diaz found a loophole because they really got after it.

Now, Diaz was 2-for-2 on the night because he also tossed pitcher Shawn Kelley amid a bullpen implosion in the eighth.

Kelley wasn’t ready to place blame, though. “I’m not going to say anything about the strike zone,” Kelley said postgame, via the New York Daily News. “I made a lot of bad pitches. It’s on me.”

The Star-Ledger‘s Brendan Kuty adds that the dual ejections were particularly noteworthy: “Kelley had never been thrown out of a game before. It was the first time Girardi had been tossed since Aug. 18 in Boston after Red Sox pitcher Ryan Dempster hit Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez with a pitch.”

Of course, we might add the obvious sentiment that the Yankees would do well to keep their composure, but it’s a long season, and it’s a good sign to see some fire in May, which might go a long way to helping the team in what is a jam-packed AL East.

However, it seems Diaz didn’t exactly help the situation because he continually waved Kelley away, much like an annoying older brother might needle you with jabs until you exploded.

For Girardi, we can only take his word that he was respectful in his kerfuffle with Diaz at home. Perhaps the skipper said something that really irritated Diaz. Maybe Diaz was just being a diva.

None of this matters, because we should all just sit back and appreciate an increasingly rare sight, one that only shows up when umpire and manager come together like Voltron and form one beautiful debacle.

Hit me up on Twitter: Follow @gabezal

Read more MLB news on BleacherReport.com

Hey, want to see how legendary scandals are made?

Black Sock researcher Jacob Pomrenke (h/t CBS Sports‘ Matt Snyder, Deadspin‘s Tim Marchman) gave us all quite the historical reminder with this video. 

Snyder explains to whom we owe our gratitude:

From Dawson City Museum and Historical Society Collection as well as Library and Archives Canada comes some actual video footage of the notorious 1919 World Series (or the “world’s series” as it was known at the time) between the Chicago White Sox and Cincinnati Reds.

The somewhat blurry images are from a scandal that not only rocked the baseball-loving nation nearly a century ago but also spawned a great deal of modern-day pop culture.

From Eliot Asinof‘s Eight Men Out to a passing line in The Godfather II, the scandal continued to make a mark well after 1919. 

As noted, and for the uninitiated, the Chicago White Sox lost to the Cincinnati Reds in eight games, which is covered in an ESPN Classic article, breaking down each chapter of the then-budding scandal. 

What’s really quite interesting is something Marchman noticed, giving a great deal of weight to silent images. 

As you may recall if you’ve read the shoddily researched book Eight Men Out or seen the well-done John Sayles movie based on it, one of the ringleaders of the scheme to throw the World Series at the behest of a gambling syndicate was ace Eddie Cicotte, the only player smart enough to demand his payoff upfront. (He got $10,000, placed under his pillow on the eve of the Series. That’s about $137,000 in today’s money, though it might be better thought of as twice his 1919 salary.) He famously hit the first batter he faced in the first game of the Series as a signal that the fix was on and then allowed six runs, something he’d done only twice in 35 starts that year.

Marchman encouraged viewers to pay close attention to the mark three-minutes, 20 seconds into the video, when Cicotte gets blasted for five runs. 

Out of context, the video is already an amazing look back in time, taking fans to a dramatically different sports landscape. Adding specifics really makes this a poignant look anybody can enjoy. 

We don’t get a thorough look at the eight-game debacle, but we do get to see Cicotte amble about the mound as one run after another scores, which is really quite a powerful image. 

The tale seems destined to grow, continuing to add to the mystique of some of the then-banned players like “Shoeless” Joe Jackson. A video like this is exactly the kind of wonderful glimpse that will keep it going. 

Nearly a century removed from the scandal, we can appreciate it as a part of the game. Thanks to some brilliant archiving, we have a new connection to the story.

Hit me up on Twitter: Follow @gabezal

Read more MLB news on BleacherReport.com

If you thought Yasiel Puig‘s tale chronicling his escape from Cuba—as told in Los Angeles Magazine’s Jesse Katz‘s article—would make for a fantastic movie, you weren’t alone. Guess what is getting the Hollywood treatment at the moment? 

The Hollywood Reporter (h/t Los Angeles Times) reports that captivating story is in the initial throes of being turned into a film: 

In a heated competition, Brett Ratner and his RatPac Entertainment have acquired the rights to Jesse Katz’ article Escape From Cuba: Yasiel Puig‘s Untold Journey to the Dodgers.

Ratner will produce the big-screen take with Beau Flynn via his FlynnPictureCo. banner.

This is just the latest MLB star to get a nod from Hollywood. Previously, Deadline Hollywood’s Mike Fleming Jr. reported Blue Jays pitcher R.A. Dickey’s life story had been picked up after the pitcher’s memoir Wherever I Wind Up was optioned. 

In this case, the subject matter came in a harrowing and stirring look into one of MLB’s more mysterious players. While Puig has energized a fanbase with his explosive and often peculiar play, his personal life remained just that—relatively private. 

In an age when every last piece of a celebrity’s life is pored over by the media, Puig‘s arrival into America was left largely untold. 

While it remains with a healthy amount of intrigue and mystery, Katz was able to really deliver an enthralling and thorough look at a terrifying journey for one of baseball’s biggest budding stars. 

A story now covered not only by Katz but by ESPN’s Scott Eden and recounted by Yahoo Sports’ Jeff Passan who managed to garner information from Coast Guard crew members back in 2013 will now likely play out in theaters. 

At the heart of the tale is a young man who managed to finally get out of Cuba, only to find himself allegedly held hostage by his human smugglers. 

Eventually, Puig found his way to America, exploding onto the MLB scene with the Los Angeles Dodgers all while dealing with a scary situation as well as debts to unsavory characters. 

Meanwhile, Puig is remaining guarded about this unfolding story, issuing the following, via ESPN: 

I’m aware of the recent articles and news accounts. I understand that people are curious and have questions, but I will have no comment on this subject. I’m represented on this matter, and I’m only focused on being a productive teammate and helping the Dodgers win games.

The Los Angeles Times’ Steve Dilbeck has more on the project and the man producing it: 

Brett Ratner and his RatPac Entertainment made the purchase. Ratner is the director who gave Marvel possibly its worst movie, “X-Men: The Last Stand.”

[…]

Ratner, who made his mark in Hollywood directing the “Rush Hour” film series, will produce the film with Beau Flynn. The two are the team behind the upcoming new “Hercules” film scheduled to arrive in July, starring Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson.

Fans may have their reservations about Ratner, but there is no shortage of interest in Puig or his story. 

This is a ballplayer who is as enigmatic as Manny Ramirez and as versatile as Bo Jackson. One minute he is dropping easy fly balls in the outfield, the next he is throwing a cannon shot to second to gun a runner out. 

He is polarizing, energetic and above all entertaining, and that’s all without mentioning a story he is yet to really discuss. 

Some love him and some can’t stand his on-the-field antics. Either way, MLB fans have definite opinions on the 23-year-old, making him the perfect subject for Hollywood producers. 

Everybody loves a mystery and Puig remains the sport’s most mysterious, which should yield a healthy showing if and when this makes it to the big screen.

Hit me up on Twitter: Follow @gabezal

Read more MLB news on BleacherReport.com

Getting down on one knee to ask the most important question in your life while your favorite team gets massacred on the field and Shane Victorino flails at a pitch seems like a beautifully romantic gesture. 

In the ninth inning of an eventual 14-5 Yankees win over rival Boston, a man decided to propose to his girlfriend, according to Holdout Sports, which is a good thing for us because nothing else interesting was taking place. 

Victorino grounded out to third while a woman behind him said yes, giving a small group of fans some actual exercise, because this may have been the first time they needed to get up and applaud all game. 

Now you might think something like spontaneous applause might hinder Victorino or Yankees pitcher David Robertson from doing their jobs. Yahoo Sports’ David Brown has thoughts: 

Pro players have trained themselves to ignore, or at least minimize, the crowd and crowd noise. It’s possible Yankees right-hander David Robertson (who was making his first appearance since being taken off the disabled list) didn’t notice or care about the marriage proposal in his line of vision. And Victorino probably was thinking about trying to start a rally in Boston’s last ups. 

That’s all well and good, but I need clarification from the anonymous fellow who proposed, because there are so many questions. 

Was the man waiting for the perfect time, hoping the Red Sox could mount a comeback that never came? Did he consider waiting for another game, coinciding with the Red Sox also showing up? 

Does it matter that their engagement started on the same night Boston was mollywhopped all over Fenway Park? Seeing as how we couldn’t track down quotes from any party, we may never know. 

Marriage proposals continue to be a “Better you than me” scenario. Perhaps it’s us, but we never thought getting down on one knee mere feet away from another fan working off a gnarly buzz, one polishing off their third hot dog of the game or others heckling the opposition was a romantic idea. 

If you wouldn’t do it at a sports bar, chances are you shouldn’t do it at a live sporting event. Unless, of course, you don’t mind the very real possibility that your proposal coincides with a live drubbing. 

No matter, because it seems like she said yes, so Red Sox nation can hold its head high about something from Thursday night. 

Hit me up on Twitter: Follow @gabezal

Read more MLB news on BleacherReport.com

R.A. Dickey has played the part of beguiling knuckleball artist to the tune of a Cy Young Award. However, if all goes according to plan, his entire life could just captivate a movie audience. 

Deadline Hollywood’s Mike Fleming Jr. (h/t CBS Sports, For the Win) reports initial proceedings are underway to turn Dickey’s Wherever I Wind Up memoir into a Hollywood retelling. 

Actors Ben McKenzie and Logan Marshall-Green have joined forces to launch the shingle A Thing Or Two Productions. They come to the table in a big way. Tom Rothman’s TriStar Pictures has made a deal on a baseball memoir which the duo will produce with Michael De Luca. TriStar has optioned Wherever I Wind Up, the memoir by pitcher R.A. Dickey about his unusual life journey. Buzz Bissinger has been set to write the script. It becomes another eclectic project for Rothman’s upstart division.

Bissinger’s work spans a wide swath of publications, but he may be most famous for his work Friday Night Lights: A Town, a Team, and a Dream, which later became a movie and hit television series. 

Baseball fans may be well acquainted with the subject matter of Dickey’s life. The Toronto Blue Jays pitcher struggled last season but was absolutely brilliant in 2012, winning the NL Cy Young after posting 20 wins and a 2.73 ERA. 

It’s the journey that led him to that pinnacle that really resonates with fans and more than likely enthralled Hollywood to come calling. 

Fleming writes: 

His memoir was critically acclaimed as he told a tale of overcoming adversity that included being molested as an 8-year old and nearly losing his dream of becoming a pro pitcher. He was drafted by the Texas Rangers and offered a huge signing bonus, only to see the latter get taken away when the team discovered that Dickey was missing an important ligament in his pitching elbow. 

In a 2012 Sports Illustrated interview, Dickey relayed to L. Jon Wertheim on his initial throes into writing his memoir: “I had to write what was true, even if it meant going to some dark places.”

If the movie makes its way to the screen, one can assume it will be as honest a script as possible. In the same interview, Dickey offers about his own memoir, “I couldn’t share my story and not share the most difficult parts of it. As a reader, I can tell when someone is skating around the truth.”

Fleming reports Dickey had other offers, but McKenzie (The O.C., Southland, Gotham) and Marshall-Green (Devil, Prometheus) decided it was best to meet the star pitcher in person, which paid off handsomely for the duo and their budding production company. 

There is no guarantee that Dickey’s tale makes it to the big screen. With a poignant and gripping story that already inspires, you have to absolutely love its chances. 

It’s the honesty that grabs fans regardless of their allegiances, so a story so enthralling deserves its day in movie theaters around the country. 

Hit me up on Twitter: 

Follow @gabezal

Read more MLB news on BleacherReport.com

It’s never a good thing when the skipper walks to the mound, unless the manager is Terry Francona and he is meandering over to the bump to relay that you made the team. 

Fox Sports’ Joe Reedy (h/t Deadspin) reports the Indians manager decided to inform pitcher Blake Wood that he had made it to The Show with a trip to the mound on Monday. 

Here is what Francona had to say about the brief exchange on the field he had with the 28-year-old, who underwent Tommy John surgery in 2012:

When I went to take him out, (catcher Luke) Carlin was coming and I told him to stay back there a little bit…I went out there and asked (Wood) if he ever made the team on the mound? He was like no. I go ‘well, you just did.’ After that we came and talked to him the dugout but you could tell he was pretty excited.

Unfortunately, we couldn’t spot any video of the poignant moment, but Twitter, thankfully, has an image of the meeting Wood will never forget, via Indians president Mark Shapiro: 

Go ahead and stick that bad boy in your back pocket and bust it out on a rainy day, because it is just too wonderful. 

As Northeast Ohio Media Group Indians beat writer Paul Hoynes reminds, “The Indians claimed Wood on waivers in 2012 after he had Tommy John surgery on his right elbow with the Royals.” In the end, two more appearances during spring were enough to really welcome Wood into the fold. 

There is hardly a more wonderful way to find out you made it into the bigs. The Akron Beacon Journal’s Marla Ridenour provides a video of Wood explaining his feelings on making the Indians roster:

When asked about the team’s patience, Wood offered, “It’s meant a lot. Initially just giving me a chance is probably what I’ve been more appreciative of them than anything.”

Reedy reports Francona had his phone on him in the dugout, staying in touch with general manager Chris Antonetti on the possibility of keeping Wood with the squad. 

When Tito received word that Wood was on the team, he decided to do more than relieve his pitcher from the mound; he put any anxiety to rest as well. 

The right-hander, in just 9.2 innings of work this spring, gave up just one earned run and six hits, according to Baseball Reference. 

It’s a small sample size, to be sure, but it was more than enough to convince Francona and Antonetti that Wood would be an asset from day one. 

Hoynes reports that Wood will sit somewhere amid the eight pitchers the Indians will carry in the bullpen. With a brilliant fastball, don’t expect Wood to get completely lost in the shuffle of arms. 

However, with the likes of John Axford, Marc Rzepczynski, a hopefully classic Vinnie Pestano, as well as Cody Allen and Bryan Shaw, both of whom featured heavily last season, it’s going to be tough to crack into the regular rotation. Then again, Wood understands challenges quite well. 

Antonetti states, “He had great arm strength and when healthy we knew he was going to be an effective major league pitcher. We were trying to see that process through.”

Wood’s velocity is up, at times touching triple digits, and Francona, via Reedy, was gracious with his praise, “He not only got better but he got really good at it to the point where it is going to be hard to run on him because he is so quick.”

Of course, the rookie is pleased with the results: “It has been a long road but I’m here now. You don’t know what is going to happen coming back from major surgery. With the Indians sticking with me and giving me a shot, I’m happy they did that.”

Beyond the remarkable recovery and the faith the Indians had in the hard-throwing kid coming off Tommy John surgery is the beautiful manner Francona chose to deliver the good news. 

Getting ripped from the game has never felt so good. 

Hit me up on Twitter: 

Follow @gabezal

Read more MLB news on BleacherReport.com

“Come with me, and you’ll be…in a world of pure imagination.” You will also find some darn tasty stadium delicacies. 

Consider this a brief jaunt through various MLB stadiums featuring the best in food items. I will be your Willy Wonka guide of sorts. 

Don’t worry, because nobody will get turned into a giant blueberry—we hope. 

Of course, we haven’t been fortunate enough to have eaten and imbibed all of these delicious sports items, so we decided to cull the Internet for their best suggestions and have determined the most interesting from there. 

This being the case, we welcome any and all suggestions for food we may have missed or some alternate thoughts on items listed below. 

Now, we have all heard of Dodger Dogs and understand the best in garlic fries is being offered at AT&T Park. And, yes, we are well aware of Shake Shack at Citi Field and Primanti Bros. at PNC Park, so we tried to incorporate the lesser-known superstars throughout sport. 

Now let’s pick up that virtual knife and fork, put on our bib and om nom this way: 

Hot Dogs and Burgers

Atlanta Braves – Turner Field: H&F Burgers – (image via Instagram)

Consider these bad boys the most exclusive burgers on the list. As Eater Atlanta notes prior to the 2013 season, the burger joint gave away Burger Fast Passes to lucky fans who purchased special seats, giving them the ability to skip the obvious long lines. 

If nothing else, you could always hit up the Waffle House. 

Pittsburgh Pirates – PNC Park: Polish Hill Dog – (image via Instagram)

Serious Eats (h/t The Riverfront Times) has a delectable-looking image of this masterful monstrosity they describe as “A grilled, natural casing National Deli frank, topped with mini pierogies (!), cole slaw, and fried onion straws served on a potato roll from Breadworks.”

Milwaukee Brewers – Miller Park: The Beast – (image via Twitter)

Um, what?

It’s like someone unleashed a genie and saved a wish all for me. This hot dog (read: coronary in a bun) features a wealth of what we like to call “the good things in life.”

MLB Blogs’ John and Cait describe the item: “The Beast is a grilled bratwurst sliced in half and stuffed with a grilled hot dog.  Those two items are then wrapped in bacon and grilled to perfection…” 

They had me at “The Beast.” However, the dog also features sauerkraut, grilled onions and a pretzel roll, because you can have everything in life. 

Washington Nationals – Nationals Park: Half Smoke (image via Twitter)

It’s as much a part of Nationals baseball as Jayson Werth’s beard. Just don’t get any of that stuff in your dog. 

Nachos

San Diego Padres – Petco Park: Carne Asada Fries – (image via Instagram)

They are a type of nacho…stay with me, folks. If you can’t get out to Petco Park for their carne asada fries, I encourage you with the means to head to any Mexican restaurant or hole in the wall that might have them. 

If they have nachos on the menu with carne asada as well as fries, they can make this for you. From then on, this is how you will be taking your nachos. 

Toronto Blue Jays – Rogers Centre: BBQ Chicken Nachos – (See high-quality image at Baseball and BBQ)

Bleacher Report’s own Dan Tylicki once considered these one of the “most insanely delicious” in all of baseball. Taking a gander at the image, we can see why. 

Before we leave, we have to give a shout out to Camacho’s Nachos at Dodgers Stadium, which are just this side of amazing. 

Other Fare

Philadelphia Phillies – Citizens Bank Park: Crab Fries (image via Twitter)

Old Bay and cheese sauce apparently take the sting away from any future Phillies injury.

Chicago Cubs – Wrigley Field: North Side Twist (image via Twitter)

Exactly what we always wanted: a lap full of pretzel. 

Houston Astros – Minute Maid Park: BBQ Baked Potato (image via Twitter) 

Take your mind off silly things like wins and World Series appearances with the best damn baked potato in baseball. 

Beer

L.A. Dodgers – Dodgers Stadium: Frozen Beer Foam – (video via YouTube)

Here is one of the rare items I have had the personal pleasure of trying myself. Ordering it as a mere novelty, I was astonished to find that it does in fact keep your beer frosty for a couple of innings, even on a sweltering Los Angeles summer day. Science is the best. 

As for actual beverages, back in 2011, Yahoo! Sports’ Rob Iracane compiled a fine list of some of the best brew offerings around baseball. 

We can’t find fault with much, and we rather like the Nationals’ decision to offer Dogfish Head. However, we have to highlight the fine work they are doing over at Safeco Field in granting their fans a healthy supply of great beers. 

Washington Beer Blog’s Kendall Jones has a breakdown of everything you can drink at a Mariners game, including Pyramid Brewery offerings, which raises Seattle’s amount of cool points. 

Great, now we are hungry and thirsty. 

Again, this is just a small aperitif of what MLB has to offer at the concession stands. Please feel free to offer thoughts on these items and others that we missed. 

Sadly, I can only eat copious amounts of food at so many stadiums; so allow me to live vicariously through your gastro-journeys. 

MLB season is back, which means it’s time to lay out the lucky jersey right next to the pair of fat pants and head out to the ballpark. 

This season is going to be delicious. 

Hit me up on Twitter: 

Follow @gabezal

Read more MLB news on BleacherReport.com

Mike Pelfrey‘s legendary speech to Wichita State may not give you goosebumps, but it will make you laugh out loud. 

MLB Fan Cave caught just one of the myriad ways that MLB players decide to prank their teammates. This time, Twins closer Glen Perkins and manager Ron Gardenhire collaborate to pull a fast one on one of their starting pitchers. 

Pelfrey walks into the skipper’s office, where it is explained that Wichita State loves to hear from celebrities and may want an inspirational speech to keep the team rolling along in the NCAA tournament. 

We were all underwhelmed on both counts. 

Pelfrey, being an alumnus, is the perfect man to give an impassioned speech that would make Ray Lewis envious. 

Unfortunately, his ability to knock the walls down with a booming voice and colorful language is on par with the manner in which you give out driving directions. 

The 30-year-old sounds like he is ordering pizza, leaving Gardenhire to try and get something more from his pitcher, which is kind of how their relationship normally works. 

Of course, there is no Wichita State. 

Well, there is, but the Shockers were off somewhere safe from things like, “You guys always remember how good you are and what got you there” and “so go [expletive] get ’em.”

Thanks to hidden cameras, we get to see it all play out. Still, we have to think Pelfrey should have seen this coming. 

First, who gives inspirational speeches via phone? This is only slightly worse than giving a rousing text to your alma mater. 

Second, Perkins nearly gives things away from the start. Do we really believe “Darren” from the Wichita State athletic department is going to start any conversation out with, “Hey, Gardey. How are you doing?”

It’s “Mr. Gardenhire, sir,” and don’t you forget it. 

The best part of the entire charade is the end, when Perkins offers, “We appreciate that. The funny thing is, though, we are out in the clubhouse, Mike, you Munson.”

Where do we keep getting Munson from?

Now we have a glorious video that serves two purposes. On one hand, we have a wonderful look into a loose clubhouse that knows how to laugh. If we might be so bold, we might ask the comedy troupe of Perkins and Gardey to deliver another shortly. 

On the other hand, we now know exactly how a March Madness speech from Pelfrey would go, so feel free to use this however you’d like next season, Shockers. 

Perhaps, and this may just be our undying love for baseball talking, if Pelfrey was able to give this thing before the weekend, the Shockers might still be alive and kicking in the Big Dance. 

Something tells me his words could do more than move mountains. They can absolutely decimate a clubhouse. 

Hit me up on Twitter: 

Follow @gabezal

Read more MLB news on BleacherReport.com