New York Mets pitcher Oliver Perez has been a recent topic of conversation among the Mets brass, but recent rumors surrounding Perez suggest the Mets are deep into trade talks with the Houston Astros.

In the blockbuster deal being discussed between the two teams, the Mets would send the struggling starting pitcher to the Astros in exchange for their top washing machine and a brand new 2010 Cadillac Escalade. 

It is believed that the Escalade would be given to the Mets new No. 3 starting pitcher, Hisanori Takahashi.

Takahashi is new to the United States, he was brought over from Japan in the offseason, and has been driving an older Toyota model for most of the season.

Mets officials felt that Takahashi would benefit from driving around a newer car. Noting that it would enhance his self-confidence and help maintain his valuable production in the starting rotation.

But according to an anonymous member of the Mets front office, the key to the deal is the Astros ace washing machine.

“If you take a look at the Astros uniforms you can tell that they have a top-notch washing machine, their uniforms are constantly clean, and you just don’t see that in baseball these days,” said the anonymous Mets official.

It is believed that the Mets came up with this idea from the movie “Semi-Pro” that starred Will Ferrell.

The Mets have tried to talk Perez into the idea of working on his delivery in the minor leagues, much to the dismay of the southpaw.

It seems unlikely that Perez would receive meaningful work if he remained on the Mets roster.

Whether or not this deal actually takes place still remains to be seen. However, if it does occur, this deal would likely make a large impact on the Mets roster and help them make a run at the National League East title this season.

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