After the Oakland Raiders traded for the Washington Redskins’ Jason Campbell, the speculation in the swirling rumors of JaMarcus Russell’s imminent demise was replaced with inevitability.
The big man with the even bigger contract was due $9.45 million in the upcoming season and, by all accounts, nothing about the kid warranted rolling the dice when that kind of money was at stake.
And so the axe fell on May 6th, putting Russell firmly in the running for the title of Biggest Bust in the History of the National Football League.
That’s gotta sting.
The news has been fodder for numerous punchlines and snicker-inducing jabs around the country, but it’s not creating as many laughs in the Bay Area. The city across the Bay from the City is, shall we say, displeased.
So, to hopefully lighten the mood of some very disgruntled Oaktown residents and fans (or at least to give them an outlet for anger), I thought it’d be fun to bring the 510’s success story into the fray—the Oakland Athletics.
More than a few Major League Baseball players have been former college quarterbacks so what if the A’s starting pitchers traded rawhide for pigskin?
What current NFL signal-caller does each mound maestro most closely resemble?
Obviously, we’re not talking looks here—I’m a heterosexual man and everyone knows we don’t make aesthetic distinctions when it comes to our fellow fellas. This is strictly about a mix of on-air personality, body of work, age, and a healthy dose of gray area for the sake of convenience.
Don’t ever let anyone tell you that the Baseball Gods lack a sense of humor; it’s simply not true. The collective funny bone is intact—the problem is that comedy doesn’t tickle it.
Instead, it’s cruelty that gives the diamond deities a case of the giggles.
Over the course of any team’s 162-game season, a fan will see ample proof of this perversity. At the moment, aficionados of the Oakland Athletics are getting their eyeful.
Just as the 2010 Athletic campaign was taking on a very rosy glint, the Oaktown nine hit a pothole and began throwing rods. Those of you familiar with my dastardly deeds probably won’t find it a coincidence that the going got rough almost immediately after yours truly sang the franchise’s praises (and again here ).
You name it and it’s been going wrong since the club left town for a six-game road trip through Tampa Bay and Toronto —the 1-5 record doesn’t even tell the short of it.
In fact, some of the oil started leaking before the green and gold even made it out of the Bay Area.
The injury bug took a big ol’ bite out of the team, felling several key pieces in Brett Anderson, Kurt Suzuki, and Justin Duchscherer (to name a few). For those unfamiliar with the Elephants, that’s the starting catcher and two of the top three starters.
Ouch.
Not surprisingly, the pitching began belching smoke and not the good kind.
Ben Sheets suffered a regression—performance-wise—in his two turns on a foreign bump as he comes back from elbow surgery. Dallas Braden got knocked around in his first start post-mound-crossing and Trevor Cahill got shelled making his 2010 debut in Anderson’s slot.
Luckily for Oakland , Gio Gonzalez bowed his neck on Saturday and managed to salvage the one game against the Blue Jays. The southpaw whiffed eight in 6 2/3 innings while conceding only two earned runs and five baserunners to Toronto.
On Tuesday, the Athletics will get an idea of exactly how bad the carnage’s gonna get.
Vin Mazzaro will be pressed into duty against the Texas Rangers because of inflammation in Duke’s left hip. Incidentally, that’s NOT his surgically repaired joint nor is it a ding to shoulder, back or psyche—the maladies that limited the Oakland righty in two of the last three years.
Not sure if that’s good or bad news regarding Duchscherer, but it certainly takes on an ominous blush if Mazzaro can’t deliver quickly on a substantial bit of his potential.
And that’s only the arms.
The hitting—never to be confused with the ’61 New York Yankees in the first place—has seen some of the bloom come off Daric Barton’s rose. His hot, multi-hit-per-game bat has cooled down considerably, causing his average to dip below .300.
Additionally, the loss of Suzuki’s been felt as much on offense as it has on defense.
Happily, the state of the lumber is not all gloom and doom.
On the contrary, second baseman Adam Rosales put together a nice run with 10 hits in 21 road at-bats. Ryan Sweeney’s in a nice groove, as is Kevin Kouzmanoff, and Cliff Pennington contributed a four-hit game in Tampa plus a three-hit contest in Toronto.
Furthermore, rookie catcher Josh Donaldson launched his first big fly in Canada and then put on a crazy hitting display in batting practice before Monday’s game against the Rangers. My man isn’t that big, but he was powdering the pill to all fields and displaying the explosive charge off the splinter that gets scouts excited.
Obviously, BP is not the real thing, but the kid stood out nonetheless.
In one final ray of sunshine, the American League West has been cooperating.
None of the residents has been able to grab control of the division. The Rangers, Anaheim Angels (sorry, Anaheim ain’t LA), and the Seattle Mariners are all caught in the one-step-forward-two-steps-back waltz. So, despite the recent struggles, the A’s still find themselves merely a loss off Texas’ first-place pace.
Nevertheless, the Baseball Gods must relent if the Oakland Athletics are to have a chance at realizing their dream season. Sooner or later, somebody in the Junior Circuit’s western group will rattle off a winning streak.
When that happens, the A’s better be ready.
The disabled list must be cleared of critical components and those struggling pieces must cross over to the sunnier side of the street. Otherwise, the fat lady might come and go before August.
Of course, it might also help if I’d stop jinxing them…
If you were to ask me in mid-March who I thought would be the A’s leader in RBIs through the first month of the season, I probably wouldn’t have said Cliff Pennington.
Well, Pennington, a former first-round pick, is off to a strong start for the A’s this season. Through 24 games, Pennington has managed to hit .250/.337/.461 and has collected a team-leading 15 RBIs.
While his batting average is nothing to excited about, his unexpected display of power, however, should make even the most pessimistic A’s fan feel all giddy inside.
Along with Pennington, second baseman Adam Rosales has emerged as a surprising leader on offense. Rosales, who was not expected to make the team in spring training, has emerged onto the scene now that Mark Ellis is sidelined with an injury.
The young infielder has collected 10 RBIs of his own, and has gone 18-for-55 (.327) in 19 games this season with the A’s. His line of .327/.367/.491 is impressive, considering he was expected to be a utility player at best this year for the A’s.
As a team, the A’s are hitting .254 (eighth in AL), are ninth in on-base percentage (.322), and 11th in slugging percentage (.377). Despite scoring 104 runs (fifth in AL), the A’s offense has slowed down considerably since the start of the season.
The A’s pitching has been solid throughout the first month of the season (14 quality starts), but with recent injuries to Brett Anderson and Justin Duchscherer, the A’s will need more offensive production from other players like Eric Chavez, Kevin Kouzmanoff, and Rajai Davis.
Cliff Pennington and Adam Rosales have both gotten off to solid starts, but Oakland is going to need more than just three (the third being Daric Barton) hitters in their lineup.