After all this time, not only can I not believe the Giants won the World Series, I’m still amazed that they made the playoffs. It’s a little different for me since I watched a good chunk of their games (not always by choice) and never thought they really had a chance of doing anything, especially with the way the San Diego Padres were playing all year, but especially because of their G.M. Brain Sabean, who refuses to make any trades to acquire any kind of offense.

Watching him instead relying on picking up Pat Burrell or a Cody Ross, and signing Aubrey Huff, a guy who couldn’t get any at bats on an Oriole team last year. This team does have excellent pitching and while riding hot bats, really defied the odds and became World Series champs.

The big name movies that are in the theaters coming up, Due Date, The train thing with Denzel Washington, and Skyline (the more I see the previews for this movie, the more and more it looks like a comedy). On a scale of 1-10, my excitement to see any of these movies in the theatre is a less than one. These movies just seem like remakes of Planes, Trains, and Automobiles, Speed, and Independence Day, respectively. This is the best Hollywood could come up with? They have clearly run out of ideas, I can look back at the movies that came out in 2010 and can recommend two or three movies maybe, that’s it.

The 2010 Giants would make a heck of a movie, and it would play out like this.

Opening scene at training camp, with journeyman Aubrey Huff as the cleanup hitter, and the rest of the Giants lineup clinging to hope that an overweight, out of shape Pablo Sandoval will be their money hitter, and that everyone else will contribute where they can. The only reason there is a little hope is because of the great pitching, and the kicker is they have a 18 million dollar a year pitcher that can’t pitch!  Other comedic relief would be when Pablo shoots a commercial for kids to tell them how important it is to eat right, and to keep their heart healthy. Yes, this actually happened!

As the season progresses it plays out just like we’d thought it would. The pitching is great, hitting is worse than bad, causing the Giants to lose games: 1-2, 2-4, 0-1 and with an emerging San Diego Padres team, it doesn’t look good for the Giants. To make the movie more interesting we follow Tim Lincecum, Brain Wilson and Juan Uribe (he looks like he can party) around as they go out on the town, just because I would like to see what these guys would do. Plus we can add Scarlet Johansson, Jessica Alba, and maybe even Brooklyn Decker in her movie debut, as love interests.

As the season progresses the offense continues to struggle and Sandoval continues to get bigger. Fans are now begging and pleading with the crusty old G.M. Brian Sabean (played by Brian Dennehy) to make a trade for some kind of offense, “Prince Fielder available, let’s go get him” fans cry out, while Sabean thinks, let’s sign Pat Burrell and see what happens.

Then, something did happened. As soon as Aubrey Huff wears a pink thong and declares “We’re making the playoffs, let’s get it!” the Giants came alive. With their five starters, the have a great shot to win four of five games, (the movie still shows Barry Zito going out there and pitching for a little while longer, but for his sake we give him a “injury” which is why we never see him again). As the Padres start losing games, the Giants continue to win, fans are now clinging to the hope that if by some chance we make the playoffs, with our pitching, we have a chance.

Then the bald guy from the Hot Tub Time Machine arrives as Cody Ross, as the gimmicks start coming out, Fear the Beard, Beware of the Hair, and Huff Daddy provide inspiration for a team and a city looking for their first title ever. As the Padres continue in a downward spiral, the Giants, on the final day of the regular season beat the Padres to clinch the N.L. West title.

Now as the rest of the world is paying attention to this team, announcers everywhere are saying,  “They have good pitching but with that offense they have no shot.”  Yet somehow the Giants bats continue to stay hot and a new star emerges each game (We can even play “Cinderella Man” as we show clips of someone else stepping up at the plate), leading them to beat Roy Halladay, Roy Oswalt, Cole Hamles, Derrick Lowe, to get to the World Series, where they would face an imposing figure in Cliff Lee, who hasn’t lost a playoff game ever. And, you know the rest of the story…


We’ve got it all, the heroes, Tim Lincecum, Matt Cain, especially with two young guys in Madison Bumgarner and Buster Posey breaking out. Unlikely heroes in Ross, Huff,  and Edgar Renteria. The tragedy figures in Zito, and Aaron Rowand (they account for a third of the teams payroll), Pablo Sandoval who is a tragedy figure in himself, and a character we all dislike in Sabean, but all come around to like in the end.

The villains, the Atlanta Braves chant, and we’d have to make the Rangers and their fans look like they were bad people, (this is the only non accurate part in the movie) all this with a Cinderella team, with a happy ending. The end credits would even be Lights by Journey. There it is, it would make a great movie, and if you paid attention the whole year, made a great movie.

Span out here with “Lights” playing, what an ending

There, using a story that has already happened, that took me what, 20 minutes and is already a better movie that anything Hollywood has shown us in a long while.

Congrats to the Giants and all the Giants fans, I know how long it’s been, make it a month-long celebration. Just don’t count on a sequel being made.

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